Today marks 90 days in quarantine. It started almost like a break. Two weeks of home before we rushed right back into life. And we treated it as such, as the gift it was. Each day we tackled projects we hadn’t even had time to think about for over a decade. Feeling accomplished, we’d take a late afternoon nap and then enjoy a nice meal or movie each night. A break. Restorative. Home. Settled. Together.
Then, out of nowhere, we got the news our sweet Sunny had terminal cancer. And all of a sudden, the coziness of March seemed dark. Heavy. I’ve always said that dogs give you something people cannot. And I was not sure what I was going to do without my faithful sidekick of over 12 years. Each day was spent on high alert, wondering if today was the day. The end. Then schools were closed for another month. What seemed like a break now seemed daunting.
As March slowly faded, light began to peek around the corner. Warmth began to seep in. April. We celebrated our Ian’s birthday. Together. Springtime took hold and by the time we got word that we would not be going back to school this year, we had accepted the inevitability and built new routines. Comfort is found in routine, even if it’s a new routine.
But then as May eased into June, the end loomed. Big changes. The end of the school year for Joey. Bigger changes for Ian… the end of elementary school, the beginning of middle school. I’m still working on putting into words what all that feels like. Big changes in the midst of endless uncertainty.
So here we are. Ninety days later. Our sweet girl is still with us, our constant. Our new puppy Buddy has brought the joy that only a puppy can bring, reminding us that the world is wide and wonderful. And that it’s best shared with the ones you love. A gift of quarantine.
It feels like a lot has changed, and sometimes it feels like nothing has. Time has moved quickly and stood still. There has been loss and there has been gain. Being rejuvenated, being exhausted. Missing the connection that fueled our days. Feeling grateful and questioning. Deep emotions, the kind we breathe in and out.
Ninety days in quarantine. Change and sameness. Ebb and flow. Loss and gain. Life. Or at least how it feels right now.