I was in the garage this afternoon putting my shoes on, moments away from beginning a walk. I could feel the door open behind me. I already had my music going… the same song I’m writing this to. I needed this alone time today.
A busy morning of prepping, this day feeling so different. Because of the pandemic and also because it was 60 degrees on Thanksgiving. Through the open door emerges Ian, lips moving but I was already somewhere else in my head. I pull an AirPod out and hear him say, “I love you. I want to go on a walk with you.” I said, “sure” but truth be told, I begrudgingly agreed. I really wanted this time alone.
I turn off my music, grab a water bottle and we start walking. By the time we got around the corner, I was grinning. We were playing this game he made up, connecting in a way that only comes when there’s nothing else but each other. We walked throughout the neighborhood like that for a mile and a half. As we rounded the corner onto our street, he looks at me and, in all seriousness, says, “Race you!” I start laughing and he takes off.
We have been together for 258 days and this was as connected as I’ve felt in all those days. I need to do this more. I will do those more. Together without distractions. Just us.
And that song playing? “Home.” Sure, home is a place. But it is also Ian. And Joey. And Jason. And Buddy. For the past 258 days and when we’re again able to venture far, home will always be “wherever I am with you.”
In a year that feels like we’ve lost so much, we’ve really had it all all along.
Happy Thanksgiving to all.